Sep 5, 2015

Snippets from the Retired Life



Mr. Husband turned to me the other night and said the worst possible thing a man can tell his wife:   "You are turning into your mother."  Couldn't argue with him, although I've yet to accuse him of stealing my false teeth and I don't save thousands of plastic shopping bags all throughout the house because "some day they will charge you for using plastic bags and I'll be ready." 



Perhaps if I ever get false teeth that day will come, but in the meantime, I apologized in advance for what I expect to be a lifetime of hell for this poor man.

Speaking of my mother, I volunteer in the gift shop of the local hospital where my mom spent a lot of time.  I'm "giving back." The other day someone called the shop and asked if we had "Nutella to Go."  And potato chips.  And, because well, it's the hospital, lifesavers.

Why, yes we do. (Except for water, the gift shop is a lifeline to an early death.  Not an apple or a pack of almonds in sight.)  Turns out the caller was a patient in the heart unit and wanted delivery. This isn't the Ritz Carleton, so I told him I didn't think we delivered anything to patients other than flowers.  Wrong.  So we deliver fat, sugar, and sodium to a guy in the heart unit.  Not sure what I am "giving back."

Speaking of an early death, I get a gel manicure every couple of weeks.



My nails finally look decent.  Blue, pink, orange.  I've tried them all.  LOVE.  However, this week my manicurist told me I have to stop because my nails are too thin.  Plus they have started to hurt.  Apparently gel manicures are not good for you.

So I told her that I could use the $ from the gel to get my hair colored professionally (I started home coloring after I retired to save $$ for $tamp$.)  Her reaction:  "Good, your hair is gray and green.  Time for a change."


$$ for $tamp$ or hair?


23 comments:

Susan Raihala said...

Stamps. Definitely stamps.

My SIL has tried gel manicures and found the same effect as you. Seems like those should be reserved for special occasions only and not regular use. So why don't the manicurists tell you that BEFORE your nails thin out and start to hurt?

That's a rhetorical question. *sigh*

Betty said...

no brainer - stamps win!! i quit the gel/shellac a long time ago - try OPI Nail Envy and a polish for just a manicure. as for the hair I let mine go white years ago - low maintenance me.

Mary W P said...

I say go to the professional colorist for a "fix" (if your hair is indeed gray and green). Have the pros get your hair all one shade, something easy to buy at the drugstore to do root touch-ups. So that's one month's craft budget. Then do touch ups yourself for awhile so you can buy more stamps!!
If your hair gets too strange color-wise, spend the money one month for the pro again.

Marianne said...

well....first of all. we pay a 5 cent bag "tax" here in montgomery county md. Second....yes gel nails are deadly. STOP NOW ! Just get them oiled and buffed....go natural. And third. .... Go after that grey hair. Go to a pro and get it done right. That home stuff is going to lure you into a false sense of skill that will backfire on you. Plus the products the pros use are so so gentle on your hair and the massage alone is worth the price of the color treatment .

Lisa Silver said...

OK... so here's what I've done for my graying hair. I went to a salon for an all-over color close to my natural shade. This is a mouse-ash-blah-blonde...

Then, I went to a beauty supply shop (Sally's Beauty for me locally, but I'm sure you have others) and found a Clairol professional color and the cream developer base stuff. I mix it at home and have the exact same thing as they would do at the salon for about $8 per color. I can't beat that deal!

And now, I shop for stamps. ;)

Sabrina said...

Ha! Sometimes even I hear my mother in myself...
Some of your post made me giggle. Here, there is a charge for plastic bags, and has been for at least ten years now, I guess. We had my 90-year old mother-in-law round one night this week. Apparently she wages a constant war trying to hide bags from her oldest daughter who is always throwing them all out. As she quite rightly says, if she's walked over to the shops and has bought more than one thing, she needs a bag to manage to get them home again, especially as she walks with a stick. Even if she just buys the newspaper, there are so many extra bits that fall out of it unless it's in a bag!
Stamps trump the hairdresser in my book! I reckon I'll just go grey gracefully when the time comes...

carole (TruCarMa) said...

I say just rub a pad of Saddle Brown Staz-On on your hair and buy more stamps. :)

Leslie Miller said...

Ha! I hear my mom in myself all the time. I let my hair go. It's healthier and more natural looking and I don't have to spend all that time at the hairdresser's when I could be doing something I enjoy more. I like my gray pattern, but I do have to wear more colorful clothes now. Nails get buffed by moi. Again, the time thing. I like Carole's idea.

TK said...

You're too funny! I think we all fear that problem... As for the gel nail insight? Thanks for passing along what I hadn't heard -- I don't do nails, but I know those who do!

OH Babs said...

Love your post. Before my card making days I worked on wood and decorative painting. One of the signs I used to make read, "mirror, mirror on the wall, I am becoming my mother after all." It is true for me and she speaks through my mouth when I am in a long line and there is one check stand open. With cupped hand I yell, "open another checkstand." See when you look like someone's grandma they would never expect you to have the loud mouth. At forty I let my hair grow out - yuk. At sixty I let it grow out - beautiful. I would rather pay for a pedicure and stamps.

Anonymous said...

Joan, you provided a good chuckle for today. I know I am turning into my mother, the good parts and the not so good. I have also had the conversation with my hairdresser, just this week, about retirement looming and we needed to slowly head back to reality with my hair color because I couldn't afford to professionally color it once we retire and I know that, for me, hair color is not a DIY opportunity. Gotta get that spending in line because I can't imagine a retirement without some new art/craft supplies from time to time. But my nail salon told me up front that I should avoid the gel manicures because my nails are too dry and thin to start with. I have stopped expecting miracles and just aim for nails that are neat and well groomed. Thanks for the grins.

Gina said...

Eh, go natural with your hair. Let your silver shine!! :) (a friend of mine's 3y/o daughter refers to me as "that momma with grey hair" hahaha!). I love Sally Hansen's no-light gel nail polish. And Essie's, too. The polish stays on for a long time. Oh, and O'Keefe's Working Hands hand cream is *amazing* for helping nails grow. I love that stuff (and their "Healthy Feet" foot cream). Buy it at Bed, Bath & Beyond with a 20% off coupon. Rocks!!

congratulations on being named to Melissa's Just Dandy team!!! Can't wait to see what you make!!

Joan B said...

I've tried going natural but it looked horrible. At least for now until I get more gray, I will continue to color! Got to check out these creams. Thanks

Joan B said...

Good luck when you retire! it is awesome

Joan B said...

Ha! Maybe when my hair goes more gray I can go natural. For now it looks awful unless I color it. GRR

Joan B said...

Ha!!!

Joan B said...

My mom used to take hundreds of new bags from the register. ALL the time. It was crazy!!

Joan B said...

Whenever I do my own hair it doesn't look right. I may continue to have it professionally done until ???

Joan B said...

hmm...now that's a thought

Joan B said...

your hair rocks!

Joan B said...

I agree. I will not use gel again though. Just the buffing to take off the polish is rough. I'll keep the regular manicures and go without polish for a few months.

Debbie Olson said...

Oh, Joan, I hear you on this post! I said something the other day, and Benjamin said, "You know that you sounded just like your mother, don't you?" Well, that's okay with me, for the most part! I'm straddling that hair-color fence as well. . . I've used the 28-shampoos stuff the last two times I bothered coloring it, just so it would all grow out the same color instead of with a skunk strip up top. ;-) I'm pretty sure Mr. Paperlicious will keep you, no matter what!

Jackie said...

Young people are actually coloring their hair gray, so I say go for the stamps and embrace the gray. I did and I haven't regretted it. I'm not fooling anyone into thinking I'm 39 by having lovely brown hair, and I get the occasional senior discount without asking. Booyah!