Jul 1, 2015

Stamping Destroyed My Life: Prologue.

Stamping Destroyed My Life


Date:  May 14, 2014
To:  M
From: Andrew Farther
Subject:  PSR

See the attached.  Call me.


Presentence Report

Pursuant to Rule 32 of the Criminal Rules of Procedure, the Office of Probation submits the following Presentence Report for M.

Conviction: M was convicted on April 3, 2014 of 3 counts of violating US Code 1000000.54(B)(j)(iii)(A).

Defendant’s Criminal History: None

Defendant’s Social History:  DOB:  12/24/[redacted].  M was born in New Haven, Connecticut, the oldest of 4 children.  Her father was an accountant and her mother a homemaker.  M graduated from Johnson High with high honors, and Valonia University with a degree in journalism. M moved to Washington DC, and then Fairfax, Virginia shortly after graduation. 

M is married to John [redacted] for 34 years and has two children, Emmaline (known as Buffy), age 24, and Garrett (known as Garrett), age 22.  

M reports that, up until 2001, she had a very happy marriage but that the “stamping industry”, particularly “release nights” and “design team issues” destroyed her marriage. 

Defendant’s Employment History:  M was employed as an Administrative Assistant prior to the birth of her first child.  Since that time M states that she has been unemployed.  However, given the nature of her conviction, this is clearly not the case. 

Likelihood of Rehabilitation:  Poor.  M has almost no grasp of the seriousness of her crime; indeed, even after conviction, she maintains her innocence.  In her interview, M continues to blame others for what she calls her “situation”.   She provided a somewhat garbled statement to this office, which was consistent with her testimony at trial.  In summary, M reports:

On a sunny Saturday in 2001, M walked into her local craft store looking for a 3-sided piece of poster board for her son's science fair project.  On her way to the poster board, M's eye caught a display of little jars of brightly colored powder nestled in a neat little row.  Curious about the powders, M approached a saleswoman who pointed out that they were embossing powders and used to make greeting cards with shiny raised print.  M bought 14 bottles of embossing powders, a “rubber stamp”, paper, a heat gun, and special sticky ink, as that is what the saleswoman advised. Although M did not know it at the time, her walk into a craft store that day was her first step towards a lifetime of heartache and sorrow, because that is the day that M became a stamper.

The Probation Office fails to see how embossing powders and a practice known as “stamping” are to blame for M’s felonious behavior.  Of particular note is her reference to the heat gun, which also figured prominently in the trial.  M continues to place blame on others for her own crime, and therefore this Office does not believe she is a good candidate for rehabilitation. 

Furthermore, we do not recommend that M be sentenced to probation or community service, as urged by her counsel.  M’s counsel indicated that M was willing to teach “stamping” to homeless women as a way for those women to earn a marketable skill and so that those women could “save money on greeting cards.” 

While this Office agrees that “stamping” apparently saves money on greeting cards, and is a way to earn a living, M is not a candidate for such community service as it would require her to purchase additional stamping supplies, and, given the history of this case, that would not be in the best interest of the community.   

Sentencing Recommendation:  3 to 5 years


Date:  May 14, 2014
To:  Andrew Farther
From: M
Subject:  re:  PSR

This is bullshit.  3 to 5 YEARS????  Expect you to handle.  No time to call. 

PREVIOUS:  Press Release
NEXT:  ChapterOne


Deborah Frings said...

Brilliant! Your writing is a joy to read - thank you xxx

Starla said...

I have been known to let all chores and such go to the wayside while I read a book. These snippets of the story may cause a nervous breakdown!!!

Betty said...

wonderful prologue - can hardly wait for the next installment - offer to be M's proofreader is still open but it looks like several lawyer's might be needed more.

Cindy O said...

The gripping nature of this story unfortunately might distract me from my internet shopping. Please try to make it more boring. Thank you.

Glorie said...

Anxiously awaiting the next installment.

Unknown said...


Joan B said...


Joan B said...

I'll talk to M about it.

Joan B said...


Laura Norris said...

So funny!! We can all relate! :)

Theresa6453 said...

My goodness. Not only are you insanely creative, your blog readers are too! Love the post and the above comment. Perfect.

Diane McVey said...

This is GREAT. It makes me smile everytime I think about it. Can't wait to see more!!!

Chris O said...

As a PO and stamper in Oregon I love your report (what we call a PSI). However, I would like to know how long you have been investigating me!

Diana K said...

Just found this thread. Like M, I have also saved a lot of money making my own greeting cards. I'll be following the rest of her story to see what else we have in common.

Marjorie DUMONTIER said...

Sorry but I’m French, someone can explain this to me : “DOB: 12/24/[redacted]” ? Thanks !